I WAS FUCKING MAD ABOUT THE GNOME LORD THING BECAUSE SHOULD HAVE JUST LEFT IT ALONE. INSTEAD I DECIDED TO EAT IT TO KEEP MY STRENGTH UP. YASD 4 LIFE.

Yo! I just started playing NETHACK, which is probably the hardest actual game that I’ve ever played in my life. Because I am too legit to quit, I play this shit without a GUI (GUIs are for pussies who like “3D” and “physics engines” and “bloom” and “shiny”)

I couldn’t be bothered making a nice screenshot of my NETHACK, so here are some characters embedded in “pre” tags that hopefully display properly, I have drama with pre tags on this server:

 You see here a silver ring.
                                           ------------
                                         ##.....!.....|
                                           |...........#          ------
                                          #...........|           |.*..|
                      ---------------   ###------------           |...(|
                      |..%...........|##########               ###-@...|
                      |...%...........###    #                 ## |....|
                      +.......< ......|       ###              ### |....|
                      ---------------          #              #   ------
                                               ###          ###
                                                 #          #
                                              ---.-----   ###
                                              |{......|   #
                                              |........####
                                              |.......|
                                              |.......|
                                              ---------
 Zach the Ronin St:11 Dx:13 Co:12 In:11 Wi:18 Ch:11  Lawful
 Dlvl:3  $:120 HP:39(41) Pw:36(36) AC:6  Exp:5 T:1073

EDIT: Fuck.

I keep fucking dying because NETHACK is brutal. Check it out:

You made the top ten list!

No Points Name Hp [max]
1 1350 zach-Val-Dwa-Fem-Law was poisoned in The Gnomish
Mines on level 5. Poisoned by a rotted gnome lord
corpse. 51 [51]
2 921 zach-Kni-Hum-Mal-Law died in The Dungeons of Doom on
level 5. Killed by a bugbear. – [43]
3 557 zach-Rog-Hum-Fem-Cha died in The Dungeons of Doom on
level 3. Killed by a kitten. – [23]

To give you a little perspective on just how brutal NETHACK is, here is a little excerpt from the man page (um, man pages are kind of “built-in-help” on UNIX-based systems):

To win the game (as opposed to merely playing to beat other peoples high scores) you must locate the Amulet of Yendor which is somewhere below the 20th level of the dungeon and get it out. Nobody has achieved this yet; anybody who does will probably go down in history as a hero among heros.

So, who is up for some serious 1987 gaming? I know I am.
P.S. Sorry if I don’t blog for a couple of days, I have some fucking kobold zombies to ruin.

Complaints about “I WAS FUCKING MAD ABOUT THE GNOME LORD THING BECAUSE SHOULD HAVE JUST LEFT IT ALONE. INSTEAD I DECIDED TO EAT IT TO KEEP MY STRENGTH UP. YASD 4 LIFE.”

  1. I’ve heard of this. I’ve never played any rogue likes as i was born after the pussification of video games and don’t like being challenged.

    hooo shit! whole podcast on roguelike games if you wanna expand your horizons.

    http://download.gamevideos….

  2. Oh man you have made a mistake getting all involved with that shit. GOODBYE LIFE AS YOU KNEW IT

    HELLO 3AM MARATHON GAME SESSION

    BECAUSE YOU CANNOT FUCKING SAVE

  3. Sure you can save! You just ‘S’ in gameplay and it prompts you for save before it exits (Save and Suspend).

    You can also start the game with different names and it remembers the saves for each of the names:

    $ nethack -u NAME

  4. PS DOWNLOADING PODCAST AS WE SPEAK

  5. podcast was pretty fun – they talked about some rogue-like game for a bit and then FFVII!!!!!

Go on, whine about it.