So Zach is away getting famous and Goss is freaking the fuck out about his life and everyone else is thinking “why the fuck should I keep coming here if you never update?”

Well here I am to save the day and share some porn. I like Lady Gaga. She writes her own music about loving dixxx and designs her own clothes to show her bits. I’m sort of wondering if she’s been going a bit far for attention lately? Is flashing your tamp string the new flashing [...]

I’M SELLING OUT. HERE IS MY APPLICATION FOR AN MTV JOB. PLEASE DON’T ABANDON READERSHIP IN DROVES, OH, PLEASE, OH, PLEASE, OH, PLEASE, OG.

SOME CRAZY RUSSIAN GUY ALL IN BLACK WAS RAGING ABOUT HIS DOG NOT BEING FED FOR TWENTY HOURS. HE WAS ALL, “IT MIGHT DIE.” AND I WAS LIKE, “DUDE, THEY SEDATE THE SHIT OUT OF THEM. THE DOG DOESN’T CARE.”

Yesterday T’Nealle, James, Charlie and I spent the better part of nine hours in what is basically a holding area for bad kids at Los Angeles International airport. I learned some important things: Never get a visa for the United States. Never. Just fill out one of the green slip things and tell them you’re [...]

BENJAMIN FRANLKIN, I ADORE YOU / IF IT AIN’T ABOUT MONEY, BABY, I IGNORE YOU

So I was talking to Goss today about cash monies and we came up with a sweeter plan. Get laid ⇒ get aids ⇒ get the sickness benefit ⇒ get paid. AIDs = $$$ =

PERKS: THERE ARE SOME TOTALLY BANGING ASIAN BABES WHO COME THROUGH THE AIRPORT. THEY DON’T CARE ABOUT ME BUT WHATEVS.

Can’t sleep can’t sleep can’t sleep right now but I have a proposition for you: I’m going away – does any body want my job? It’s at the airport which is ages away from Mt Pleasant so you rich fucks need not apply. I whine about the early shifts because they fucking suxxor but the [...]

NEXT UP FOR THE FIRING SQUAD DEATH CENTRE GAS CHAMBER MASS GRAVE GALLOWS DIRTY NEEDLE AIDS BATH ROUND ROBIN

DIE MOTHERFUCKERS, DIE!