THIS COURGETTE CAME FROM OUR VEGETABLE GARDEN AND IT IS GOING TO BE DELICIOUS
Over the past month or so Simon has planted and tended to a fruit and vegetable garden at our house. TAKE THAT, T’NEALLE!
IN WHICH I DISCOVER I AM A JEWISH VEGETARIAN WITH A TOOTHPASTE-BUKKAKE FETISH
This morning I was feeling particularly happy about being home so I went down to the butchers and bought a kilo of their Award Winning streaky bacon and the other ingredients essential to an English Breakfast. Anyway, the food part isn’t that exciting. After cleaning up with Dove I got down to chilling on the [...]
BUT WHATEVER YOU DO, DON’T GET A BIG KING BECAUSE THEY ARE JUST A BIG MAC AND THEY’RE NOT ‘BIG’ AT ALL
Last night we walked a kilometre down the road to a Burger King that didn’t exist until we’d bought food at some little Turkish place. Halfway through my falafel dürüm I looked over Sheridan’s shoulder and saw it glinting in the cool, night air.
AS I WAS CUTTING I WAS THINKING: “OH, MAN THIS IS SO STUPID. LOOK AT THE HORROR I HAVE CREATED.”
This morning I opened a pack of cornflakes with a serrated knife. It was one of those plastic packs of cornflakes that are pretty cheap to buy that have fairly nice cornflakes in them. I basically destroyed the top of the packet due to how poorly suited to the job the knife was. As a [...]
I KNOW I HAVEN’T POSTED FOR A WHILE BUT PLEASE FORGIVE ME BECAUSE NOW I AM HELPING YOU EAT
Hello everyone, I have just made a delicious snack and I have come here to tell you about it. I was just going to take a photo of it and let you see it, but someone stole my stolen phone so I guess I will have to create it out of images from the Internet. [...]